The children of Israel were used to living in the light.

When God sent the plague of darkness to the land of Egypt, the Bible tells us, “And Moses stretched forth his hand toward heaven; and there was a thick darkness in all the land of Egypt three days: They saw not one another, neither rose any from his place for three days: but all the children of Israel had light in their dwellings.”

The Israelites understood what true darkness was only through observation: they had always been God’s people with the hope of His promise of redemption waiting every moment for them.

They watched God move in miraculous ways. They watched God move in the land of Egypt to free His people from slavery. They had seen the sea split in two and had been lead by Him away from every bad thing that had every happened to them.

God tells Moses that He wants to speak directly to His people and His people are ecstatic! They can’t wait to hear what He has for them.

Maybe they expected Him to come as a light. Maybe they expected Him to come as a mighty, shining King. But the Bible tells us, “And it came to pass on the third day in the morning, that there were thunders and lightnings, and a thick cloud upon the mount, and the voice of the trumpet exceeding loud; so that all the people that was in the camp trembled.

And Moses brought forth the people out of the camp to meet with God; and they stood at the nether part of the mount. And mount Sinai was altogether on a smoke, because the LORD descended upon it in fire: and the smoke thereof ascended as the smoke of a furnace, and the whole mount quaked greatly […] And the people stood afar off, and Moses drew near unto the thick darkness where God was.”

God was in the darkness. And only Moses drew near.

It’s easy to shy away from the dark storms that meet our lives. It’s easy to get scared and lose our faith in what He’s told us to do. But we’ll never develop into women close to God’s heart if we steer ourselves away from the dark times in our lives. We must keep our faith in light or in darkness.

The children of Israel had the incredible opportunity to physically and audibly experience God’s Word. But because it wasn’t what they were used to or what they had in mind, they backed off from the experience. Except for Moses.

We’re used to living in the light. But if we stay there all the time, we’ll never grow. If you really want to grow up in Christ, you have to draw nigh to Him.

James 4:8 tells us, “Draw nigh to God and He will draw nigh to you […]” He never says that drawing closer to Him will be easy. He never says that what we experience to draw nearer to Him will be all light: there was darkness where God was. But can we choose to see His light in the midst?

So, how do we practically draw near to God’s darkness?

1. 1. Keep praying. Psalms 55:17 tells us “Evening, and morning, and at noon, will I pray, and cry aloud: and He shall hear my voice.” It’s really easy to forget to pray when you’re going through a dark time in your life. It takes time and effort and sometimes, it just feels like you’re spent before you even start. But it helps. Even if you can’t bring yourself to say a full, lengthy prayer, try to pray in smaller, basic sentences one or two at a time throughout your day. And remember, God understands even the unspoken words of our hearts that we pray to Him.
   2. Ask the right question. “What can I learn from God through this?” instead of “Why is this happening to me?” When our heart is aching, it becomes very easy to be self-centered and self-focused. But if your eyes are on you, you, and you, you’ll never see God in the darkness. God tells us that He has a purpose for our experiences: how can you use this experience to glorify Him? This darkness you’re experiencing has been prepared for you and made it past the filters of God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit straight into your life. Are you going to waste this moment, this hard moment, and not draw near to Him through it? 
   3. Give and take. Take help when it’s offered to you. Be willing to accept the help God places next to you while you endure your darkness. Don’t be an island enduring the storm all on your own. Take help when it’s offered and you’ll endure the darkness much longer than on your own. I think of Esther asking Mordecai to ask the Jews to pray for her as she went to face the wrath of Hamaan. I think of Job hearing the words of his friends post-disaster. I think of Paul and his gratitude for the prayers and help from various churches as he endured dark time after dark time. Psalms 50:15 tells us, “And call upon me in the day of trouble: I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me.” It’s so much easier to stand against a storm when you’re not alone. Give God the glory when you walk into His light and find yourself drawing near to Him. Look for ways to glorify Him.
   4. Keep moving. What if Moses had stopped in the darkness and never left? He would have missed more miracles, more growth, more times of being led and protected by the Lord. It’s very easy, especially when you endure a particularly dark time to stay there mentally. I think back to the first time I fell in love (grown up love) with a man and the moment I realized we weren’t going to be forever. I focused on myself and ruined the following two years of my life in my anger and sadness. I think back to the first time someone I loved passed away (more on that next month). I let myself feel sorry for myself for two and a half years and refused to move on after the experience. I harmed myself by refusing to move on from my pain and self-focus. A Christian can only go one of two directions: forward or backward. If you’re not moving forward, then you’re moving backward. But we’re to draw near to God, not away. Don’t stop moving.

If you draw near to God’s darkness, the darkness will only bring you closer to Him when the light returns. I’ve often wondered, if the children of Israel had only drawn near with Moses, would they have been as discontent with their lives as they were after this experience? Or would they have learned to obey Him the first time and walked with Him into the Promised Land?

What darkness are you enduring right now? How can you use this darkness to draw near to Him? Are you still moving?

Love, Meghan